He is my Lord & Saviour
I have erred quite seriously by throwing myself into the way of temptation & possibly the devil's plan yesterday. GOSH @_@ Although my Holy Spirit can discern the things that are not true, my faith was undoubtedly a little shaken. Of coz I do have faith -.-" Gosh.. =.= if not the title of this post would not be as it is @_@ I meant, for yesterday since it happened, I was thinking about it. Constantly. I was starting to wonder & question beyond what I usually questioned. & there was a sense of doubt. UGH CHLOE, Y R U SO UNWISE =.=
To me, faith is juz... believing & trusting in my Lord & Saviour, not doubting Him & even why He does or says certain things. To me, He loves me & He is willing to send His son to die on the cross when we are all sinful people who do not deserve His grace. Somehow, tt's sufficient. Maybe this is wad Louis meant by child-like faith. lols~O.o
I thank God that Tim was there with me. I think he behaved in the way a loving brother in Christ would have behaved. & I totally thank God for Tim becoz of that. Maybe God doesn't want me to go into that chapter after that. Perhaps I was straying on the brink of His permissible plan.
UGH @_@
I'm not guilty of it. I tink that it's a good thing because after that, I established the fact that I shall not be shaken by views tat are cynical & rather weird. & if my walk was down yesterday, I will really stumble & juz crash & die =.= now that I tink about the seriousness of the consequences... I really was super unwise. Tim was telling me that through it, he realised that the Spirit really had the ability to save.
Oh thank God I have the Spirit T.T nobody can be with me 24-7 except Him so if He didn't speak to me I will probably believe everything inside.
Through this incident, I learnt that ... Cynicism really kills faith. & I shall not test my Lord because I know for myself that He really lives and nothing should be able to contest that. I also realised that I really lack humility. I was on the verge of stumbling because I really thought I could handle it. Obviously, I was kind of wrong. I muz really stick close to Him... [".]
=======================================
Btw, my gals r really SO NICE ^^ thank God for em. Coz end of year will haf church camp, which I definitely wana go (: YAY~ & then... obviously I'll nid $$$. so i was quite stumped as to whether to go prom or not. But my gals r going to pay for my entrance fee! I'm really like O.o oh my!!!!!!!!! I mean, I dun even mind not going, coz having been to sec sch prom, I realise is reali burning a lota money away when we go prom T.T sadded for e $$$ T_T & my parents aren't willing to sponsor me now, unlyk in sec 4... T.T So yahs... Plus my study bible... then obviously I'm super the broke if I go for prom. I mean, yes, I can wear my sec 4 gown. I can borrow my sister's shoes. But I can't do make up on my own or style my own hair. UGH. & $85... but heard it'll be duno how many course meal. so yups (:
I'm really thankful to my girls for being so nice~It'll be my 18th bdae gift from em. So blessed! Actuali it's sort of wad I wanted. Gifts r e side point, company & love & friendship is what I truly want from others on birthday. Juz a simple thing lyk making e effort to wish me happy birthday or spending tym with me is enough for me (: [although I wudn't say no to gothic clothes or if u're really broke lyk me, can juz buy me a hp accessory wif food on it! Or food earrings~ $2, can right? x) hahas, if u've read my previous entry, u'll noe y I want company on my bdae T.T lols xP ] I think I'll really haf fun wif em around ^^V definitely~ although .... I do feel very bad... =.= coz it's lyk... wah, I so big shot arh, every1 pay to let me go. Is lyk... I feel bad oso coz it's not cheap at all T.T *sighs* y muz dey b so nice to me?? O.o & e weird thing is I'm not exactly even dying to go. I mean, of coz I love 'my gals' (quoting Nia) hahas~ but then... wow... So touching to see their heart to let all of us go prom together. Such a simple thing but really speaks volumes.
I really thank God for every single 1 of em. Hope God'll bless em & pour down e gates of heaven containing lotsa blessings 4 em~! (:
