1st day at work, parting to come, 2009...
Actually technically, I didn't start work yet.
Once again, thank God that I got into the teaching internship & till February 20th I don't have to worry about finding a job. & after 20th Feb I think I'll be worrying more about much more important things...[".]
Now I'm quite worried that I end work really late & I won't be able to take leave to go down to school T_T
God, will You please make a way out for me? T_T
can't orientation start after 20th February? T_T
Anyway I went for staff meeting. Chongfu Primary has about 90+ teachers. Everyone sat about in tables chatting. I met my mentor today, Mrs Low. She's a christian too! She goes to FCBC, faith community baptist church. & seriously, I think she treats me like a daughter. In a way... @_@ she lives VERY near my house, near thomson plaza at the semi-detached behind longhouse. & she drove me to thomson plaza today in her car after we had buffet style lunch after the meeting. the meeting was long, from 8 plus to 12noon. we had a tea break with some food & I got tea (: the tea was sweet & it was really the way I liked my tea to be made. thank God for the wondeful food ^^
All the teachers were super nice to me & natalie. natalie & I are the only 2 interns in the school under this MOE internship programme. She's from RJC & she lives along the stretch of thomson road near my house too ^^ WOW what a small world. LOLs x) & guess what? the principal lives in the same block as me! YES, like totally OH MY TIAN? O.o
I was like... [."] Mrs Low was like, oh you live in Shunfu road, you won't happen to live in blk 308 would you? & I was shocked, I was like, how did you know? Then came the revelation. The principal Mr Pek is really young & a very nice man. he jokes at the meeting too but when he gets serious, you can tell he's a responsible principal. The VP Mrs Ho is very young too, she's very sociable & nice.
Everyone of the staff is just really kind & friendly to us. & I was really quite surprised to see so many christians in the profession. You can tell by the things they paste on their staff tables. LOLS for once I'm allowed inside the staff room with a tap on a pass. Just that I need to get my pass only after 12th Jan. it's so weird, being inside the staff room as a teacher. As a student, that's normal. But as a teacher...
Wow, God, I really pray that I learn alot through this experience & really discover that my calling is really to teach people, to empower the generations to come, to be a salt & light in the teaching profession ^^
then again, everything's in Your perfect plan of course. I just try my best this 6 weeks^^
one of the plus sides is the money. & the contacts lenses my mum paid for first. She told me she wanted the money back. Naturally. $120 for 7 pairs. monthly lenses.
speaking of my contact lenses, I had the scariest moment of my life today. Ok, maybe not the scariest =.= but I was removing my lens in my left eye & then I couldn't get it out. I tried & tried & tried forever. can you imagine the pain? & the fear? what if I couldn't get it out? would I have to be operated on? my eyes were swollen red with all the failed attempts. I think the problem was that my fingernails were too long at first, then after I cut them, they were really too short to successfully take the lens out -.- that was really scary. I think I'll lay off contacts for a while now. either that or disinfect everything .___. cause my right eye kept tearing today & causing my nose to run. It was so annoying! Luckily it only started after the meeting ended, during lunch when everyone was eating & just interacting like students interacted with students. (LOLS that was stupid... of course, teachers are human beings too!=.=) thank God I finally got the lens out after more tearing in my left eye & constant & desperate pleas to God to free my eye from the pain my attempts were causing.
I used my ATM card for the first time today at thomson plaza. I think I will so totally overspend if I'm not careful enough. I must really limit my budget in 2009! No more spending too frequently, even if it's productive stuff or things to bless others! x_x I burnt $50 just like that on books I chose at Daily Gifts -.-" The one for myself was called "Being a girl who serves" (serves God & people) & the other one... I felt that it was what the person I intended to buy for needed for spiritual revival. When you've been a christian long enough, you'll know what I mean when sometimes you feel like you're not as desperate for God or as faith-filled.
I will not pretend that I'm not sad as the day creeps nearer & nearer. Maybe that's why I tried to distract myself by putting all my energy, love & blessings into the card & the letter, hoping that it would somehow make me feel better. Maybe I'm just trying to comfort myself, to look back at it & think, wow I really put in so much time & effort into it. Prayers, blessings, card, gift, letter, affirmation... I guess that's all I can give (:
I guess why I'm dreading it is because I know after he leaves, there will be more partings. I've never handled partings well... I used to cry every night when I left Guangyang primary school to go to Anderson Secondary. I cried when my sec 2 class was separated as we chose different subject combinations. Then I cried the night a few days after sec 4 prom as I knew we would be parting ways, to poly or to different jc's.
Somehow... I haven't cried cause I'm leaving JC yet.
I guess... what's different is I have God now. I know that even if everyone leaves me, God will still be by my side, speaking to me, forgiving me & showering me with love. of course, scolding & rebuking me harshly when needed, cause God never softens His heart when I'm sinning continuously without repenting. this I learnt the hard & long way... [".]
I'm afraid to cry cause my caregroup is going separate ways... This is really new for me. Friendship in a higher dimension, a relationship that God is inside, serving God together, crying, laughing & labouring together... Advice beyond what friends give, advice built on God's Word, on biblical truth, truly words of wisdom. Company beyond company, going the extra mile for others. & what I admire most about it is it's always a two way thing. Everyone gives AND takes. Nobody just keeps taking & doesn't give. Because we all know of the strongest love: the love of God.
Separations are inevitable. We part with a promise to grow together to become powerful men & women of God ^^ yes, we will continue to break new grounds, to achieve the impossible for God, to persevere on till we finish the marathon, to be a salt & light wherever we go.
Thank You God for placing me in TJ care group. Every single one of you have made a significant impact on my walk with God, in so many countless ways (:
Thank God I found you- by Mariah Carey & 98 degrees
This song has a really nice tune (:
2008 has been a smashing year & 09 will be a year of growth & I pray that God will use me more & more & more^^
My resolutions for 2009:
1) To be a shepherd, to take care of God's sheep, to love, care, teach them
2) To revive TJC. to do whatever it takes to let someone experience the life transforming love of God. Without God, I don't know how A levels period would have been like... Like O levels? crying every night before each paper, afraid that I won't do well enough to go to TJC? O.o Not anymore. I really want CG08 to be completed. & I want to be part of the team to plant & water the seeds. God, if You are willing to, use me!!!!! use me!!!
3) To grow in patience. & to grow, I have to be tested in it. God, please test my patience & groom me to be a patient person! (I guess becoming a teaching intern would count as a test, especially when children misbehave -.-") patient yes, but relenting no. Firm & patient yes.
4) To pick up new skills in talking tactfully & relating to people & observing their body language etc to understand others better
5) To grow closer to God, to understand the true significance of His grace more & more each day
6) To get to make more friends in university ^^ & participate in more activities if my schedule permits.
God,I place these resolutions into Your hands, thank You for revealing to me through the Spirit these few days that I really lack patience some times if I'm interrupted when I'm busy x_x & to show me that sometimes I'm really too -.-" simple minded. To be able to understand others, I think I need to be more observant & more tactful.
I really look forward to a year of more break throughs & alarming growth (: YAY ^^
come 2009! I will conquer you with God XD
